Suicide Effects

Tears for My Mother


Mom- What have you've done?

Left me alone without an explanation.

You could've shared the darkness with me

But, choose a way out for your Son to see.  


Did you end your life this way?  

Crying- I want you back and stay!

Please tell me why you ended it this way.  

Everything you taught me is down the drain…

Did you think it would cause family strain?

Why can't you hold me again while I Cry ...

Please tell me why you wanted to die?  

Why Why Why…  

Momma? Where are you—Momma? Momma?

I can't find you…please help me mommy…I feel alone…Mom? Mom?  

This is a true story of how suicide will create havoc in a family.




National Suicide Prevention Day


During the month of November 2006, I received a phone call from a friend in Chowchilla, California stating the Police were attempting to find me due to a family emergency. Yes, as a business owner covering multiple Counties, I was rather difficult to locate. I knew my Dad was in poor health at the age of 75 and expected this call was to let me know he was admitted to the hospital.

Dad was a heavy smoker which resulted with ¾ of his right lung removed. These thoughts went thru my head as I dialed the number. While the phone was connecting I was praying “please lord help my mom thru this since I am 3500 miles away”. When the line connected I was relieved Dad answered “Hello”.

Accelerated thoughts resulted in “oh no, Treycher' (the teacup poodle my parents purchased after the untimely passing of Shalimar- the first dog). Yes, they were part of this family.


I asked dad “what's wrong?” He responded by bluntly stating

“Son, your mother committed suicide”. He continued to state “she loved you”